This is my land, that is your land

Hypnosis

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Picture this behind closed eyes:

You are standing very still. Breathing slowly. You try to listen to something, but there is no sound. There is no smell. You are standing still, in a wooden house. Your skin feels nothing. What is nothing?

Breathing slowly.

You try to remember who you are, or what you’re doing standing still in a wooden house. Nothing. No memory.

There is a sound.

Muffled voices. Strain your ears to listen to the whispers between lovers. Your consciousness shifts into their conversation and you leave your body to float within their essence. You realize that you only need to hold breath to leave body.

“No sense of sound, light, speech. No information goes into you through these senses. What do you do then?”

“Can I still feel?”

“Feel? How will you..”

“Through my skin?”

“Do you feel through your skin?”

“What do you mean? Of course I feel through my skin, when someone touches me, I feel something. Or if I hold on to a burning matchstick for too long because I’m stoned, I feel pain”

“So…you’ll be able to feel me even if you can’t see me or hear me?”

“Only if you’re close to me”

He shuffles his feet and looks down at the wooden floor, the sharp shadow created by the afternoon sun of a dying winter day streaks over his shoes that have left footprints in the dusty labyrinth that is this house.

He is resting against the wall on his side, and she is in front of him with the window between them.

There is nothing you can see outside the window apart from a glorious light that breaks through the dusty glass.

There is an odd taste in his mouth, reminding him of his grandfather.

He looks up at her and sees her staring outside the window. White light shape her face and she looks older than herself, like the moment before the white oleander touches the ground after falling from a tree.

He whispers “What if I’m far away. Will you still feel me?”

“I’ll call you every day, and write you letters…”

He moves his face close to hers and kisses her on the mouth. She closes her eyes.

The knife cuts open into her stomach and enters her skin, pushing a gasp out of her mouth. He moves in swiftly and holds her hips, pulling her closer to himself with his mouth on hers. She feels the pain rise up her spine and he bites her lip. This pleasure and pain combined transcends her consciousness into understanding that her body is capable of two extreme sensations at the same time.

With the knife lodged in her stomach he puts a hand on her vagina, slowly rubbing her while she bleeds .

Her body lies in a fetal position on the floor. Red stains the dust on the wood and he sits next to her, staring out the window. White light blinding his face. He can breathe now. He is no one anymore, nothing. His fingers interwined in her dead bones. A moth sits on his hand.

It could have chosen to sit anywhere else in the whole room.

You only chose to sit close to him.

Like a ghost.

You wake up in a forest with ants crawling over your feet

You wake up in a forest with ants crawling over your feet.

There is a foul taste in you but it reminds you of your lover, so you pick up a poison berry from the shrub under the shadow of the dying tree and put it into your mouth.

The ants die faster than you and you go back to sleep in the forest. Forever.
No…please don’t let it be morning…please…let the sun not rise…I need the darkness to hide in. the shadows comfort me as I become invisible, one with nothingness.

Please…kill the sun. please kill the sun.

Please.
The pleasure. The pleasure is beautiful. Our tongues running around our bodies, consuming our skin, our nails digging into our skin, our voices moaning beyond the whispers as we fuck. In the back of the moving car without a driver.

I grab on to your hair from behind you as you scream with bursting of our energy as we fall faster in the car.

We fuck harder.

The hill gets violent.

I fuck you.

So hard.

I love you right now. The only kind of love I know.

Deep inside you, I lay burning. Burning to explode like a billion stars rushing towards the light. Burning within; without the outside.
The car rolls over the cliff.

Parts of our body lie scattered in the valley below.

A snake eats my legs.

A vulture eats my eyes.

A coyote eats my mouth.

The crow takes my dick and flies away with it.

Rats finish up the rest.
Your body is covered by floating butterflies. They die as soon as they touch parts of you and cover your whole shell. You are clothed in dead butterfly wings.
I wish I could fuck you again. Lick you and eat you at the same time.
But then it wouldn’t last a lifetime.

A lifetime is just a blink of an eye.
There is nothing. Everything is a lie and that is the only truth. Trying to not think and thinking of trying to not think and trying to not think again and again and again and again and again.
Please eat the sun.
I can see the world explode underneath your clothes she said to me and I closed my eyes and I fell back, not caring if anyone was there to catch me. Waiting to hit ground, my eyes are closed and I try not to think of falling.

I’m still falling. .

It’s been two hundred thousand lifetimes and I am yet to crash into something. Still falling.
Still born. The moment I was born I died.

So did you. All of you.
As you open this letter, slowly, scared of getting a paper cut while your nose bleeds covering your white shirt, making patterns of cherry blossoms in the white.
Wait…as you open this letter, slowly, scared of getting a paper cut while your nose bleeds….it covers your shirt…I can see it from the corner of my eyes…so…as you open this letter…even before you’ve read the first line or tasted a word of mine…you bleed.
bleed.
You ignore the mirror as your reflection begs for some recognition and the sink is stained red no matter how much you try to rub it away. Vigourously searing away at the surface, trying to replace the red with white.
You open the letter
You smile and bite your lip
A fly sits on you
Consuming your warmth

while I watch from a distance chained to the bed like a dog without a tail and this moment Is so beautiful.
Whisper to me again

Of what you want and what I gave
Sky

The sky isn’t there today

Did you kill the sky?

It took me a long time to paint it.

Can you give me back my sky?
There’s a fly on your fucking eye
I wish I could taste you again just to fuck you again to be with you again and I would hate you even more than the love I don’t want to feel for the blood from your nose still lies on the letter

You read the first word
The first word that ever was and ever will be

The only word

There is no other
You try to memorize the word, holding it close to you tightly clenched in your palm as your long nails dig deep into your skin and your shirt burns to the ground.

Naked you love me more for I can see you and you can see me and no one else seems to mind the sun.

Kill the sun for me and you can keep my sky.
You say the worst

Buttons from moth eaten coat lie scattered amongst broken pieces of glass as the whole world looks at us.
Rolling around the floor with my hands tied at my back, I can’t breathe in this house of yours as the fire flows over your grandmother’s old chair and I can feel the fire but not see it.
You see me lying there in the heat, about to burn, about to resemble the last shade of grey in your castles dungeons.

About to entirely evaporate

If I wasn’t there, no part of me was there for you to hold or smell or touch or chew or feel or fuck or suck or kneel in front of on the ground or nibble or stab or burn or spit on or hold or punch or cut open with scissors or feed seeds of a sacred flower hoping it would grow out of a navel or to stand next to or have over you or under you or behind you or far far away from you or loving you.

If there was no part of me for you to love anymore
Not even a memory

Nothing
Would you care for me right now?
So let me fall into you once again and I swear I will hide deep inside a crevice of your deepest darkest wound that you never want to open again and ill heal you from the inside out until you and I become one and I try to not think of the time you read the first word of this letter that is right now in your hand and you are staring at me in the mirror and smile at me as I lie in the middle of your room, feet chained, hands tied behind my back as your house can be seen glowing like a new revolution’s spark in the dark night and I lie here turning into the shade of grey found in a graveyard

Will you burn to the ground with me?
We could get washed away in the rain and flow into the river where we would finally merge or if the wind is strong, it can carry us together, away from this self-created hell.

“Did you burn it?” I asked her

“I ate it”
I looked at her and smiled.
“That’s why I love you” I said to her

“you love me to fuck me”
I smiled and looked away
We get into her car.
The ink leaked from the pen I used to write her the letter

She drove us far away
My hands are stained blue

She’s sleeping in the backseat

And I’m driving far away
She wakes up and holds me

The road seems to never end

But I don’t mind

Never mind

dreaming

I did not write this

Immortality

As time slowly comes to an end, my mind is eaten away by the emptiness of my soul.
The music being played in my mind gets converted into unnecessary noise. My heart melts in the rain, just like all the metal houses on the planet. The whales start to jump out of their fish bowls into the red sky. The panda’s are no longer endangered, they are extinct.
All of us keep on chasing misprinted lines. We all fight our battles, alone, all alone. But we unite for the war that will affect us all.
All our rights are raped & burnt beside the crucifix, which is red due to the color of the dried blood.
As the vultures hang in mid- air, waiting to be devoured by the hardness of the sky, they realize their fate, faith.
Disappearing, disillusioned words. Our minds wander to the extraordinary fact. The apocalypse. The Armageddon.
All of our faith gets washed away. As we all wait for the end, we seem to realize all our mistakes.
Jihad, war, world war, politics, AIDS, abortion, murder, rape, acid rain, torture, prostitution, miracles, death, A.I., life.
Everything we owned will get submerged into the emptiness of the planet. We prepare ourselves for the evacuation.
Addiction, ecstasy. Our mother is dying, we killed her.
Nothing we do can change the consequence. We need to hold on, to each other, to ourselves.
As we all cry and the infants choke in the artificial air that we breathe and human created water that we drink,
We blame no one but ourselves for the end.
The silence is unbearably loud. We all get down on our knees and cry, no longer praying.
The end has come. Evacuation is impossible. Everything stops. Everything becomes zero.
Death. Survival? Impossible. Survivors? None.
As everything vanishes, a hint of life can still be felt.
In the far end of the planet, a seed is buried deep into our mother’s body who regains her strength. Who assures togetherness. We will rise, again.
Faith is regained.
Love is felt.

You wrote this?

Ashes

As the life slowly fades away from her eyes, I can no longer sense her pain.
The trick is not to cry. The trick is not to laugh. The trick is not to smile.
The trick is, that there is no trick.
Trick¿
The music never seems to stop. Her last words are drowned by the silence of the music.
Then as she fades away from my mind, heart…I realize and laugh.
The mystery has been solved. The questions have been answered.
Everything is connected.
Physics¿ …matter, anti-matter, warp speed, time warp, supernova, energy, vector, light…everything is connected.
I realize that we all are just part of this huge system.
We are the cells of the battery that run the system.
We all die, and are regenerated as new forms of energy.
No heaven, No hell¿.
Just plain reuse, reduce & recycle.
Humans? Just a bunch of used up rechargeable batteries. Just a form of energy.
Just like the sun…just like the stars.
As I look up to the night sky, waiting for signs to show me my end, I see the stars.
The stars that constantly shine for me. The stars that guide me.
That’s where I have to go. To the stars.
The stars…

Who wrote this?

Abyss


Because tonight I saw you breathe,
I saw the abyss in your eyes,
In the cold, wake away,
Too hot, hide away…

I feel like a hole,
Bound free,
Whispered loud,
I breathe,
Try to wake up…

Maybe in the gray,
Tonight I felt you fall,
Away

You are…whole…
Tonight…I die alone…
Signal with your eyes
Maybe tomorrow…
I won’t be home…

little bit of gold, little bit of pearl

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i cant see it while clicking it,
oh no i cant see it,
no no no,
ok thats it.